Broken heart – probably one of the worse things that we can experience. It’s that gut wrenching pain in our chest that keeps us awake at night. The pain that ties us to our beds as we lie and stare at nothing. A broken heart is what made sleeping become my best friend, it was my only escape from reality, from the reality that he is no longer mine. Of course, falling asleep was hard but for me, waking up was just unbearable. That moment when you open your eyes and the pain of reality just slaps you right in the face – the reality that it’s certainly over and there is just nothing that you can do about it.
Living with a broken heart is never easy. There is just no quick way to mend it, there is no way to sugar coat the pain. It’s just agonizing to know that you have given so much, you already did what you can do to make everything work but it still ends up hurting you. If you are going through this path, please know that you are not alone, you are an amazing and strong person and you will get through this! Take it day by day and I know eventually you will make it through. To help you out, I will share to you some personal tips on how you can make it through a broken heart.
Accept the Pain
I know this one is difficult, I even thought that it’s impossible at first but I realized that this should be the very first thing to do. Go through the pain and not around it. Don’t try to hide it, don’t try to mask it with the illusion that you are doing okay, that you are happier because of what happened instead embrace it, allow yourself to feel it. Remember that ignoring the pain is not healing.
Allow yourself to cry
When I was going through this road, I told myself that I won’t grieve. I told myself that instead of crying I’ll have fun. I went to parties, got drunk and I pretended to be happy. But at the end of the day, I still found myself alone and lonely. I then realized that masking the pain is not going to help get rid of it, for me masking what I truly felt only made it worst. So I cried, I cried my heart out, I cried until there was no tears left for me to cry and surprisingly it made me feel better. Don’t be afraid to cry, crying is never a sign a weakness, crying is a way for us to let go, a way for us to embrace the reality and eventually the crying will stop and you will rise stronger than you were before.
Let time heal your pain
As cliché as this may sound, but I’ am a living proof that time really heals. I once thought that this line is just crap but it’s not. Time heals, your heart will heal. Some may say that time heals, but the scars stay. Yeah it’s true, but I see scars differently, scars are beautiful, it’s what makes you, you. Scars are reminders of the battles and struggles that we have experienced, those battles and struggles that we have conquered. So be patient and know that time will heal your pain.
Explore new things
If you have been putting something off a while back or if there was something that you wanted to pursue before but you never actually gave it a try then this is the perfect time to do it. You may have lost yourself a long the way because of the pain, so this is the perfect time for you to find yourself. Find that passion that was once inside you and channel it to something that you love to do. This will not only take your mind off things but this will also help you grow.
I used to put so much blame on myself. I told myself a hundred times that I was the reason why it ended, that it was all my fault. But I realized blaming myself will not do anything, it will certainly not bring back the past, I’m just hurting myself more. Blaming myself was preventing me from letting go, from moving on, it kept me on that same spot, the same spot where he has left me. If you are doing this, please stop! stop with all the blaming! Don’t be too hard on yourself, don’t be your self’s enemy. Love yourself, learn to love your whole self. All your weaknesses and strengths, all your flaws and assets, all your mistakes, that is you and You are beautiful!
Remember not all endings are painful. Some endings could be a blessing in disguise. If that relationship worked out as I hoped it would be, then I wouldn’t have felt the happiness and contentment that I’ am in right now. So be patient. Pains don’t last. And always remember that better things are coming. You are amazing and stronger than you think. You can do this!